Flower
by The Demon Of Sloth
Summary: A flower cannot be unsightly. (FemJulian)
1. Part I

Flower

 _Ever since birth, everyone would always say that she was pretty, gorgeous, enchanting. As she grew older, she kept true to those words. With smooth white skin, silky blonde hair and enchanting blue eyes, she was the human counterpart of Aphrodite. Every woman admired her and every man wanted to marry her. After all, who would take their eyes off a rich, powerful and beautiful lady?_

 _Her parents always referred to her as a flower: a beautiful, untouched flower sitting in a plentiful green garden, outshining the other flowers around her. When she was a child, her mother would comb her hair through their fingers, all the while telling her that she was beautiful. The young girl would smile and nod in agreement as she stares at her own reflection in the vanity mirror._

 _They say that a rarity like her should remain pure. Only then can she truly be beautiful._

 _After all, a flower cannot be unsightly._

 **…**

"Stop this now, Julia!" Sophie cried. Wales just stared in shock—disgust, maybe?— with his mouth agape.

Eliminate the enemy. That was the task that was assigned to her. Sweet and simple; nothing more, nothing less.

Destroyer charged straight forward at the Cetus duo.

"Those without power shall be destroyed! The weak should simply accept their fate, so just deal with it!"

A powerful blow was landed to White Cetus, causing it to wobble. The gladiator rose from its bey and raised its sword, about to deliver a finishing blow.

"Julia!"

"Not so fast!"

Blue Cetus slammed into Destroyer with incredible force, temporarily halting its moves.

"I guess there's no other choice here! Let's go Sophie!"

"Joint special move! Grand Deucalion!"

A huge, fearsome wave loomed over, ready to submerge its opponent into its depths.

"Please listen! Open your eyes Julia!" Sophie pleaded, her eyes shining with—sadness, pity?

 _Just go away…_

"Just be quiet! Black Excalibur!"

The sword slashed at the wave, sending both beys and their bladers into the air. They screamed before landing on the floor in an ungraceful manner, along with their beys clanking on the floor.

A part of her job was done. She grabbed her bey and stiffly turned away to deal with the other intruders.

She heard Wales hoarsely call out her name, before stopping in her tracks. She did not care about her ex-teammates who were lying on the floor pitifully.

 _No… get away from me…_

Sitting on the stairway, crossing his arms and glaring at her intently like a disappointed parent, was Dashan Wang.

He stood up. "So you've become Hades' pet monkey, huh? And now you're so low that you're battling your former friends?" He closed his eyes and shook his head ever so slightly.

"You've fallen as low as possible, Julia Konzern."

 _How low?_

"I won't waste any more breath on you." He took out his launcher and aimed it at her. "You're a traitor! You will lose!"

"Dashan!"

"She's a good person!"

Julia laughed at Wales's remark, and partly at Dashan's declaration, acting like he knew everything about her. She pulled out her own launcher, glaring daggers at him. He wanted to battle her? Fine then, she would give him what he deserved.

Their beys clashed fiercely and the battle dragged on for quite some time. She was determined to make him lose, to make him lose face, to make him go through the pain that she felt. But she knew that her last declaration was impossible.

"Why would you sink low enough to join Hades?" Dashan demanded, pointing an accusing finger at her.

"You don't know how I suffered! I now have nothing but this dishonour and this despair! You don't know how I've suffered! You don't know what it's like!

"No, I don't."

 _Of course. Of course you fucking don't._

She shook violently, clenching her fists so tightly that her knuckles turned white. The constant flashbacks to her glory days where she was the apple of everyone's eye were taking its toll on her. She could feel the stares of disappointment of her family on her shoulders, telling her how much of a failure she was, how disgusting she was.

 _Unsightly. Impure. Tainted._

"And I don't want to understand the feeling of someone who thinks so little of beyblade." All of a sudden, Dashan ferociously stomped his foot on the ground. "You're wrong, Julia Konzern!"

As he went on rambling about the honour of beyblade and how he'll never back down because he had friends, Julia was on the verge of walking up to him and punching him square in the face.

"Julia, when you lost to Damian, did you really lose everything?"

 _Yes._

"It is impossible for someone to keep winning forever. True strength comes from getting back up and trying again. That's your problem Julia; that's your weakness. There is no way that you can defeat me."

The nerve! He was really testing the limits of her patience. She commanded another wave of Gravity Brave, yet Zurafa stubbornly held its ground.

"Special move, Storm Surge!"

A strong burst of fire knocked her off her feet, causing her to land on the floor ungracefully.

 **…**

— _pushed on the floor—panic—and a voice: "so pretty…"—_

 **…**

Julia resisted the urge to scream. Instead, she looked up at the blue sky with weary eyes.

"I'm weak… I'm weak, huh?"

Destroyer was wobbling. Pathetic whimpers escaped her throat as she brought herself to a sitting position. Soon the match would end with her bey in a sleep out. So much for putting Dashan in his place. So much for even trying.

 _I have nothing left… it's over for me…_

"Stand up Julia!" Sophie said, bringing her back to reality.

"It's not like you to lose that easily, so stand up!" Wales followed.

"Please, I know you can do it!"

She stared at them in disbelief. Why in the wide wide world would they still speak to her despite following Ziggurat's orders and hurt them both? Maybe they hit their head too hard, she thought.

"Your family's wealth doesn't matter. Ziggurat doesn't matter."

"That stuff has nothing to do with us at all. We're your friends, aren't we?"

Her eyes widened. _Friends?_

"We are Excalibur!"

"The proud and invincible sword…"

 _If you knew… would you_ still _speak to me?_

Pushing those ugly thoughts aside, she gritted her teeth and shakily rose to her feet, with Sophie and Wales encouraging her like parents teaching their child to walk. There was no reason for her to complain about it since she had acted like a whiny child the entire time.

For the better of the doubt, she continued fighting for the sake of her friends who were still on her side and cheering her on. But when her bey came flying back to her and clanking on the ground in all its misery, she was temporarily paralysed by the sharp sting of failure.

Sophie and Wales held their breath but visibly relaxed when Julia turned and smiled at them.

"A broken sword can be fixed. There will be a new, stronger Excalibur."

Wales beamed, and Sophie raised her hand to wipe a stray tear from her cheek. Dashan smiled.

For the sake of her friends, she would paint a smile on her face and stay strong.

 **…**

After the Spiral Force incident, Julia had been quick to recover her fortune. Needless to say, her family was not happy with her failure, but since she was able to make a quick comeback she was forgiven.

Her mother rushed over to shower her with hugs and kisses. I'm so glad you're fine. My precious girl has suffered greatly, she said.

At the corner of her eye, she could see her father rolling his eyes. For god's sake, he said. She's fine. She's back in one piece after all. Nothing's wrong with her.

Julia stiffly nodded in agreement and wriggled herself out of her mother's tight grasp.

 **…**

While Julia was doing paperwork in her room, the door suddenly burst open to reveal her bouncy and energetic younger brother. He was carrying a backpack and held a file with his left hand, having just returned from school.

"Big sis! I'm having trouble with my schoolwork. Can you help me?"

In the past, she would scowl and tell him to go away; always claiming that she was too busy to bother with someone as insignificant as him. Despite the hurtful words, he never took them to heart and continued supporting her in whatever she did. Now, she was a much kinder person. She made it a promise to make up the mistakes of the past.

But of course, not all mistakes could be fixed.

"Of course." She closed the plastic file that she was holding. "Are you still stuck with geometry again?"

"No, it's Algebra."

"Algebra? I thought we went through that."

Nero pouted his lips. "Yea, but every time it just gets more and more complicated and I can't catch up! And I'm worried that I'll take up too much of your time..." He lowered his head in shame and whimpered. Julia shook her head and kneeled down to his eye level.

"Now don't be upset. I have all the time in the world for you, little bro. What questions do you have?"

At this, Nero tilted his head upwards and his frown turned upside down. He opened his file and took out a few math worksheets that looked like it had seen better days.

They sat at her desk going through the algebra problems step by step. It was a long, tedious session, but when they were done, Julia felt a strong feeling of accomplishment. Nero turned to face her older sister and thanked her with wide eyes that held pure innocence.

Sometimes she felt a little envious of that innocence.

 **…**

A month had passed.

Christmas was coming, and the entire team decided to spend the holidays with each other in Julia's mansion.

The entire mansion was covered in festive decorations and bright lights, including a massive fig tree placed at the dead centre of the main hall. Under the tree, numerous gifts wrapped in pretty wrapping paper and ribbons were stacked in a generous pile. Nero, being the festive person he is, mostly helped out with the decorating.

Julia was never one to celebrate Christmas or any other festive holidays. She thought they were a waste of time, so Nero thought that it would be a brilliant idea to cover her room with ornaments, mistletoe and lights overnight without her noticing somehow.

At exactly seven o'clock, Nero switched on the Christmas lights and yanked open the velvet red curtains, blinding her with intense rays of sunlight. Furious of her beauty sleep being so rudely stolen, she chased her brother around the mansion in her nightgown. She nearly ended up strangling him, if not for the servants manually prying her apart from her brother.

When the gang arrived, Sophie insisted that they went shopping since she had not done so in a long time, and wanted to spend some "lady time" with Julia.

After they had lunch, they headed off to the mall where they spent hours entering and exiting high-end stores, buying whatever their hearts desired. The men had to carry mountains of shopping bags, and it proved hard for Wales due to him being less fit than Klaus, who was carrying two times more bags than him and didn't look tired at all. He ended up camping at one of the many benches scattered across the mall to rest his weary legs.

Sophie was browsing through racks of dresses and skirts, occasionally frowning when she couldn't find anything to her liking. It was quite some time before her smile was replaced with a grin as she picked out a striking black skirt with elaborate patterns at the rim. She showed it to Julia.

"Hey, this skirt looks really pretty. I think you should try it."

Julia looked up from a rack of blouses and grimaced. "No thanks."

"Huh? I thought you loved them."

"Really, no thanks. I rather wear long pants."

"But…"

"I said NO!"

Sophie jumped, taken aback by her sudden fierceness. A few customers turned to stare at them.

"Sorry… my tastes have changed. I just don't like repeating myself, see?"

"It's fine. We'll just look for something else."

At the end of their shopping trip, Julia had bought a massive amount of long pants and long sleeved collar shirts that would last her for a very long time.

 **…**

That night, the dinner table was filled with exquisite food served in generous portions. Meats were cooked till tender and juicy; vegetables fresh and soups were boiled till rich and thick. For dessert, a chocolate fountain was prepared alongside with fruits, marshmallows and cups of hot chocolate. As Nero said many times before, you can never have too much chocolate.

Being the cheeky bastard he was, Nero hung mistletoes anywhere he could. Julia had ordered the servants to take them down, yet the boy kept on replacing them as if he had an infinite supply of those plants.

She nearly got caught under a mistletoe with Wales but managed to escape by pushing Sophie towards him. Seeing his new victims caught under his trap, Nero hollers at them to kiss, just like what he had done to many other unfortunate servants.

The Cetus duo was extremely flustered, and their friends' teasing cheers didn't help either. Left with no choice, Wales gave Sophie a quick peck on the cheek, making her entire face turn beet red from sheer embarrassment.

They spent the night playing video games on the console; with Wales winning every game they played by a leap. When questioned about his gaming skills, he just smirked and twirled his fingers gracefully, saying: "Two things. Quick reflexes and nimble fingers."

Too absorbed in the games, they failed to realise that it was nearing one o'clock in the morning. After stretching their cramped arms and legs from hours of nonstop gameplay, it was time to retire to bed.

Julia bid goodnight and headed to the exit, when Klaus rushed towards her with an outstretched hand which was holding her handkerchief that had somehow slipped out of her pocket. She thanked him and took her handkerchief back when Nero started shrieking and bouncing like he was on a sugar high (maybe he was, judging by the sheer amount of chocolate he consumed during dinner).

"You guys~," Sophie said slyly, and Wales started chuckling.

It was now Julia and Klaus' turn to be embarrassed. He rubbed the back of his neck and backed away slowly.

"Excuse me..."

"Nu-uh! You two must abide by the rules!" Nero chided, shoving his sister to Klaus. She stumbled and let out a cry of surprise from being pushed with so much force. Klaus reached out to catch her before she suffered a nasty tumble.

Wales, Sophie and Nero were laughing like excited schoolgirls, making the pair even more embarrassed than they already were. Klaus flashed a sympathetic smile and whispered. "I'll make it quick."

He held her shoulders and leant forward.

 **…**

 _-punched the floor—squirmed— "I'll make it quick…"—_

 **…**

She screamed with all of her might, shoving Klaus away. She screamed till her throat became sore and her jaw hurt from being open wide for so long.

Her friends stood rooted on the floor, their eyes wide open in shock. A few servants actually rushed in after hearing their mistress's cries of distress, wondering what happened to have triggered her.

Everyone then started to crowd around her to voice their concerns, not knowing that it only made her more frantic. Klaus and Wales had to yell at the servants to leave them alone.

Sophie led a very pale Julia to the couch to rest and told one of the servants to fetch a glass of water.

Nero looked like he was about to cry. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! I was just…!"

"It's fine," Julia said, waving her hand in dismissal.

"No, it's not! I just forced you into doing something that you didn't like! I should make it up to you or something!"

"You don't have to…"

"I won't take no for an answer!"

"...fine then. Do whatever you want."

The servant returned with her glass of water, and Nero rushed to grab the glass to hand it to his sister.

"Are you sure you're alright? You can always tell us your problems." Sophie said.

Julia took a few tentative sips of her water. "I'm fine. I just overreacted a little."

 **…**

Anyone who knew Julia knew that she was as stubborn as a mule. Her friends gave up trying to get her to talk about her troubles, not wanting to push her into an uncomfortable spot. Instead, they let her do the talking and did not attempt to pry her for answers to questions that she was uncomfortable with.

It seemed that sweeping dust under the rug worked. Julia was content with this arrangement, and her friends had nothing to complain. They continued contacting each other through emails and video chats and gave updates on their lives.

Sophie and Wales got together, much to everyone's glee. Klaus commented about how it was about time Wales grew the courage to confess.

Julia was happy for them; she truly was. Yet there was a strange yearning for someone to love her just like how Wales loved Sophie and vice versa, even though she technically had no reason to feel that way. A beautiful and wealthy woman such as her shouldn't even have to worry about getting a man's attention, and ultimately his love. She was capable of doing it just by looking at their direction and flashing her signature winning smile.

They conversed for a while before she closed the chat window and returned to work. But before she could type in another word in her word document, she gagged. Slamming her hands to her mouth, she dashed to the toilet to throw up the contents in her stomach.

 **…**

For the past few weeks Julia had been constantly throwing up, and occasionally she would skip her meals as she lacked an appetite. No matter what medication she took, her sickness remained.

During a rare scenario where she would finish her work earlier than scheduled, she headed down to a nearby convenience store wearing a wig and shades. She paid for her items in cash, thankful that the bored cashier did not bother to question why she was wearing shades at night.

Sneaking back home through the back entrance, she dumped her plastic bag full of candies and ready-to-eat meals on her desk, taking only one item from the bag with her to the bathroom.

The seconds seemed like hours. She sat on the toilet, forcing every ounce of urine out of her after gulping down entire bottles of distilled water.

 _Hurry up, hurry up, hurry the fuck up._

With shaky fingers, she lifted the stick she was holding to eye level. If it was not for her biting her lip, her scream would have awoken the entire household.

 **…**

For a moment, Julia nearly forgot that today was Nero's graduation ceremony—with all the work that was piling up her shoulders. She had to cancel and rearrange her meetings for the day as a result. During the drive to Nero's school, her father kept chiding her about being unorganised and forgetful, though his words left her head just as quickly as it went in.

Even during the speeches made in the ceremony were all a blur to her. The only thing she could remember was Nero in his graduation outfit throwing his cap in the air, only for it to land on her head. She could not even remember the conversations that she made with the teachers and parents there; not that it mattered anyway.

For today, only the red pills that remained hidden in her desk drawer mattered. For today, only the blood as red as those pills trickling down her thighs and staining the white tiles of the bathroom mattered.

 **...**

 _It's gone._

 **…**

There was one time her mother had questioned why she was so pale and cold to the touch. She rested her head on her hands, replying that she felt a little ill before excusing herself to her room to rest.

…

Recently, the head of the Waren family, Sanderson, had been frequently visiting to discuss business deals involving the expansion of the Waren family business. He would always bring along his son, Mason, along for no reason other than to talk to Julia. They would sit down at a table with a view of the expansive garden and have high tea. Sometimes they would take a stroll through the garden and chat about their lives.

The weather was perfect that day. The sky was a bright shade of blue, with white clouds shielding the piercing sunlight and reflecting the heat. It was not too warm, yet not too cold. It was not too dry, yet not too wet.

It was perfect, to say the least.

"Nice weather we're having today," Mason said.

Julia snorted. "You can't be serious."

"Ah, I apologise for being boring."

"No, it's fine. I'm an uninteresting person too."

"Really? I think you have many interesting things to share. I quite enjoy your company."

"You flatter me."

He then stopped in his tracks, bent down and picked a white rose from a bush.

"You remind me of this rose. Pure and beautiful."

 _Pure._

She took the flower by its stem, holding it daintily with her thumb and index finger to avoid getting pricked.

"People always say how I look like a rose."

"It's true."

 _A beautiful, untainted flower._

Letting herself space out for a while, she did not realise that her finger had been pierced by one of the rose's sharp thorns until she felt something wet trickling down her hand.

Mason gasped and held her wrists to assess the injury, causing Julia to drop the rose. "Are you alright? Hang on; I'll get you patched up…"

After he left to alert a servant to get bandages, she directed her attention to the rose. A drop of blood landed on one of the rose's petals, staining it red.

She bent down to pick up the discarded flower. This time, she did not bother to avoid the thorns. Instead, she grabbed the stem and clenched it tightly. She hissed in pain at the feeling of razor sharp thorns sinking into her soft flesh, but after a while it became numb. By the time Mason and a servant returned with bandages, her entire hand and arm were covered in blood.

But somehow it felt right. It was as if all her troubles were extracted from her body and laying on the earth in a red puddle.

 **…**

When news of Nemesis's supposed revival arrived, Excalibur immediately went to work, doing endless research and calling up their connections to find a clue—any clue about the star fragment's location. Eventually, they managed to locate the rough coordinates of the star fragment, and soon enough its exact location. They immediately contacted Gingka and his friends, but unfortunately, the fragment had been taken away and ruined the temple that sealed the forbidden bey.

Despite their supposed failure, Excalibur promised to assist them in any way they could with their vast amount of finances and resources.

All of them tried, really. They helped in whatever way they could, but as they watched the supposed dormant Mount Vesuvius seemingly on the verge of eruption, it seemed that their efforts were deemed futile.

Was it their fault? Was it her fault for not trying hard enough to contribute something, _anything?_ After all, she was the damn leader, and leaders take responsibility for the failures of their team.

The ground shook even more violently than the last few times, causing Julia to lose her footing and fall flat on the ground.

 **…**

 _-"your fault. Why do you resemble her so much?"-_

 **…**

Julia screamed. Despite the constant reassurances from her friends to calm down, she could not stop screaming. She screamed till her throat burned and her lungs started to cave in. Yet she kept on screaming.

It was not until a tight slap was delivered onto her right cheek that brought her back to reality. Sophie was kneeling in front of her, with two glowing objects in her hand. Looking closer, it was White Cetus and Gravity Destroyer creating that glow. Looking around, she saw Wales and Klaus's beys emitting the same glow.

Picking her bey up to examine the phenomenon, she felt a strong tug. As strange and surreal as it sounds, Destroyer started speaking to her, telling her to lend its power to Gingka, the legendary blader that would defeat Nemesis. Obeying her bey's request, she pointed her bey towards the sky along with her teammates, praying for the best. Strong beams of light shot out from their beys and vanished into the inky blackness of the sky.

When it was all over and the rays of gentle sunshine were cast upon the Earth's surface, everyone laughed in relief. Sophie tackled Julia into a hug and patted her head like a mother would to a child. She told her that everything would be alright.

For a moment, she had temporarily forgotten about everything.

 **…**

One night, Julia awoke from her sleep for no particular reason.

When she attempted to fall asleep again, she heard faint scratching noises in the background. The noises became louder and louder every second, so she was sure that it was not just her imagination. She needed to have a talk with the servants about the possible rat infestation the next thing in the morning.

" _Mmmmmeee..."_

Her legs suddenly felt heavy, almost as if a great weight had been placed there.

The scratching noises grew even louder than before. She was starting to suspect that it was not a rat infestation. Rather, it seemed that a person was making the sounds. A prankster, perhaps?

"Whoever it is, just be quiet! I need my sleep!"

" _Mommy…"_

Julia froze. That soft, high-pitched and nasally voice could only belong to a child.

"Seriously! It's not funny, whoever you are! Leave me alone!"

" _Mommy… mommy…. Mommy!"_

The child began to sound distressed, almost as if it were upset at the fact that it was being spoken to in such a harsh manner. It continued to cry, and as the seconds passed its cry grew louder and louder till it reached a crescendo. Then, it's shrilly screaming began to sound fearful. It grew softer and more distant, almost as if it were being dragged away with brute force. It continued to scream for its mother until its voice was no longer audible.

Sweat coated her silk nightgown, causing it to stick uncomfortably to her skin.

 **…**

" _Play with me~"_

" _No."_

" _But why?"_

" _Go away."_

" _It's lonely here…"_

" _Go find someone else then. Leave me alone."_

" _Don't you love me?"_

" _No."_

* * *

 **Part one of my femJulian one-shot. I'm too tired to remaster the first portion ughh.**

 **Julian is dead to me and my friend. We address him as Julia and whiny spaghetti princess. No regrets.**

 **In all seriousness, this story will be treading on sensitive topics that might make some readers feel uncomfortable, but I want to keep this story T rated so nothing explicit will be written. Not bashing on Julia; I love her, but at the same time it's really fun to torture her.**


	2. Part II

Everything was quiet in the mansion in the middle of the night, save for the rustling of leaves on tree branches, the incessant hissing of crickets, and Julia's heavy pants as she brought the scalpel that she was holding onto her skin. She poked her wrists with the sharp end, as if afraid. But as of now, she was anything but afraid.

Slowly, she sunk the blade into her skin, watching tiny beads of blood ooze out of the cut to form a thin trail that travelled down her arm and onto the tiled floor. As she continued, a puddle began forming beneath her feet. The metallic scent of blood wafted in the air, and she inhaled deeply. There was no pain where the wound was, only tingling sensations that sent shivers down her spine.

To anyone else, cutting this deep was painful, but to her it was exhilarating. Was this how drug addicts felt whenever they consume drugs? No wonder it was so difficult for them to stop.

" _Ah! You love me right!? All mothers love their children!"_

 _Go away. I want my peace and quiet._

Black spots began forming at the corners of her vision, which signalled the end of her little activity. Continuing any further would result in death from excess blood loss.

" _Eh~ continue~ continue~"_

 _Shut up._

" _But you could always join me at the other side."_

 _No way in hell._

* * *

Nearly every night in her dreams, the damned thing would be chasing her round and round in the same hedged labyrinth, calling out for her in a shrill voice that would grate her ears. Despite it only being able to crawl on its stubby legs, it was unnaturally fast. She would run and run until she was either out of breath, tripped over or hit a dead end. It would then rush over to her covered in slime, dirt and blood, before she would be abruptly pulled out from the dream, leaving her sweating and panting.

This took a massive toll on her sleep schedule, and it was evident from the darkening contrast of her eye shadows and the deteriorating quality of her work performance. People started asking if she had any problems, but she dismissed their queries and claimed that she was fine with a strained smile on her face.

Eventually people stopped asking, even her friends. Not because they were not concerned, it was because she simply refused to say anything.

* * *

Two years passed since the Nemesis incident.

Wales got a promotion, Sophie got her dream job as an archaeologist, Klaus almost saved enough money to open his own private luxury gym and Nero emerged as the top student in his school.

And as for Julia, the nightmares continued, but not as frequently.

* * *

A small box carefully wrapped in gold wrapping paper was delivered to her home. Julia does not bother to look at the card sticking at the top of the box to know who the present was from. She gently tugged at the silver ribbon and opened the lid to reveal an amethyst pendant necklace carved into an elaborate shape that resembled a warrior's helmet, almost like her beyblade. The crystal was rather huge, but not too imposing. From the weight of the jewellery itself, she could feel the hefty price that he had to fork out.

She opened a large drawer and dumped the box into a pile of other expensive jewellery that Mason sent over the course of a year in an attempt to impress her. While she does not bother to incorporate his gifts into her everyday wear, she would grab a random necklace or bracelet to put on during their weekly Saturday dates. They would dine at high end restaurants, where he would lavish her with more gifts and compliments whenever he had the chance. After that, he would bring her shopping.

Tonight, she thought no different; it was just another date. However, instead of heading back home as usual, the limousine drove to the opposite direction.

"Where are we going?" she asked.

"You'll see," he said. For a moment, she saw the corner of his lips curving upwards, before returning to rest.

 **…**

 _It was dark, but from the corner of her eye, she noticed_ him _smirking. However, it vanished as soon as it appeared._

 _She turned to face_ him _._

" _What do you want?"_

" _You'll see."_

 **…**

Holding her breath, she fiddled the hem of her coat with perpetually cold, shaky fingers. It was not until she felt a tap on the shoulder that she let go of the breath that she was holding for too long.

"Are you feeling unwell? Would you like to return home to rest?"

 _You coward. Don't you dare say yes._

"No thank you. I feel alright."

"Are you sure?"

 _Don't._

"I am sure."

They remained silent until they arrived at what seemed like a meadow. It looked like an ordinary piece of land, but upon closer inspection there were small, blinking lights floating in the air—fireflies.

Mason held her hand and leads her further into the dew-covered meadow. He reaches out to cup a firefly, maybe two, in his hands. He made a small gap between his fingers that was not big enough to let the fireflies escape, yet allow their light to be visible.

"Isn't this beautiful? Do you like it?" he asked.

"Yes, it is." she replied.

They continued to admire the scenery for a while, on occasion they attempted to catch a few fireflies with their hands. However, Julia was unable to successfully capture one without it escaping in between the gaps of her fingers. Maybe it was her prideful attitude, as she felt tears prickling at the corners of her eyes at the thought of losing to Mason in firefly catching.

"You aren't upset, are you?" he laughed.

Julia stubbornly shook her head, but this action caused her tears to splatter onto his arm.

He laughed again, before gripping her shoulders gently and pulling her into a kiss.

It was warm, but cold at the same time. But the best part of it all? She did not scream.

* * *

A year later, Sophie and Wales announced their engagement. At first, they had kept it a secret from their family and friends for an entire week before announcing it during a morning when they least expected it. Julia choked on her toast, Nero started screeching and spilt his orange juice in the process, and Klaus just nodded his head, citing that he expected it from the start.

Their wedding took place during the Spring. It was a joyous occasion. With lavish decorations, a sea of a variety of flavourful food and drinks, numerous guests strolling into the grand ballroom who endlessly showered them with heartfelt congratulations, along with a massive wedding cake that reached their height, it was a ceremony that was meant to be remembered forever in the hearts of the happy couple.

Wales's brother stood as his best man, and Julia was invited to be the bridesmaid along with Sophie's younger sisters. Naturally, she accepted, and now she combed Sophie's long wavy blue hair carefully with a comb. She was already beautiful, and there was no doubt that she would be a radiant gem wearing a wedding gown, outshining the sea of pebbles and rocks.

"You'll be fine," Julia assured.

"Easy for you to say. You aren't the one walking down the aisle." Sophie retorted back in a teasing manner.

"What happened to the strong and independent Sophie?"

"Even strong people have weaknesses."

 **...**

" _You're weak."_

 **…**

"I'm just joking with you," Julia said, placing the comb down and picked up some white hair pins.

"What happened to the upright and serious Julia?"

"Even serious people can joke around."

"I'm just joking with you." A smirk graced Sophie's thin, lipstick coated lips.

"Very funny."

They continued to converse while she worked on the bride's hair, and soon the other bridesmaids joined in the conversation. At one point, one of the bridesmaids asked about Mason. The other bridesmaids then started giggling and teasing Julia about her relationship with him. Oh, you two should get married already. Oh, invite us to your wedding. Oh, I'm certain that you'll catch the bouquet.

Julia just nodded her head and laughed, because they were partly true. From the start, she knew that Mason was the man that was arranged for her. Her father favoured him, and would constantly talk about him during meal times, mostly about his looks, achievements and his family fortune.

Was she upset that she would never experience true love for herself? Yes, because here she was, attending the wedding of a happy couple in love—feelings of envy was sure to manifest. Yet, she was an aristocrat, and it was her duty to continue the family line. She had duties to fulfil, and duty comes first before love. Call it the price in exchange for a privileged life, for she had long succumbed herself to her unchangeable fate.

Fate was cruel, after all.

* * *

On the way back home, the events during the wedding kept on replaying in Julia's head like a broken recorder. Sophie walking down the aisle in a pristine white gown with flower patterns sewn at the skirt with gold and silver thread along with a full-length lace veil adorning her head, Wales lifting the veil to kiss her tenderly on the lips, and the waltz which was accompanied by classical music played by the best musicians in all of Europe.

Just as the bridesmaids predicted, the bouquet did end up in Julia's hands. Nero teased her about it for the rest of the night, and she began to wonder if Sophie threw it at her direction on purpose.

* * *

Work was endless. Whenever she would finish one task, another one came in before she could so much as take a breather. Today was no exception.

Julia had been sitting for hours reading and signing mundane paperwork. As time passed her eyelids grew heavy and her right hand started to move more slowly and randomly, causing the words that she was writing to have slightly messy handwriting and some illegible letters. No matter how much she tried to fight it, no matter how much coffee she drank, her eyes closed and her head slammed on the desk. Her fountain pen rolled off the table and clanked noisily on the floor.

In her dream, she was at _that_ place with _him_ again. _He_ tugged at her sleeve and said that she was beautiful.

Everybody she met had called her beautiful. Men young and old would stare at her like drunk dogs, eyes filled with lust. While she did not care for animals like them, she would play with their hearts and later dump them aside when she got whatever she wanted.

However, _his_ lust filled eyes were terrifying.

 _He_ was the only person whom she cannot manipulate into submission. There was no point in trying.

So, when _he_ smirked and asked her to follow _him_ , she could do nothing but comply.

An incessant cry of distress awoke Julia from her sleep. She shivered.

 _No, leave me alone. Please._

" _Mommy is upset."_

 _Yes, because you are here. Go away and I won't be upset._

" _Mommy, it's better here."_

 _No it's not._

A penknife was situated right in front of her, with the exposed blade glinting seductively.

She pulled her sleeves, picked up the tool and pressed the sharp end of the blade to her arm, carefully carving abstract patterns on the delicate skin. Dark red beads began to form from the cuts before clumping together to form droplets of blood. When it became too heavy for its perch, it slid down her arms and splattered on an unfortunate paper document. Usually, she would go berserk when her paperwork was ruined with any kind of dirt or stain, but as of now she did not care.

As she continued to cut, her right hand started to feel heavy. More blood accumulated on her papers, her breathing grew more laboured, and dark spots clouded her vision.

She needed to stop.

Yet she could not.

It was as if her right hand had a mind of its own. Her brain was screaming at her hand to halt its actions, however her hand refused to listen.

The dark spots spread at an alarming rate, and she felt light headed. High pitched giggling assaulted her ears.

" _Yay! Yay! Yayyyy!"_

 _No no No NO NO!_

Using all of her remaining energy, she hurled the penknife across the room. She then collapsed on the floor, on the verge of passing out. Blood continued to ooze from the cuts, turning the red carpet black.

 _No, don't you dare pass out now, don't you_ fucking _dare._

Applying pressure to her injuries to halt blood flow, she feebly reached up her desktop to grab the bloodstained papers and chucked them under the desk before her head hit the floor again.

* * *

Somehow Julia managed to regain consciousness before her butler entered her office to escort her to bed. She flushed the bloodied papers down the toilet and attempted to wash off the blood from her arms and clothes. Thankfully, her shirt was black in colour and the stains were not obvious.

As she retreated into the warm duvet covers, she felt a heavy weight on her legs.

" _I love you."_

 _Get lost._

As much as she wanted to kick the weight off her, the weight itself rendered her legs useless and bound to the mattress.

* * *

" _Just kick him in the balls."_

 _She just stared at the older girl in disbelief._

" _I'm serious. It hurts the most when you kick them there. If you kick hard enough, you'll make him infertile!"_

 _This girl, a well-respected senior prefect in the school, just told her to kick a boy in the balls? Julia expected more mature advice from her to stop the numerous advances of a boy who had been pestering her to go out with him. At first, he sent her notes and love letters every day without fail. When she threw them all in the trash, he began to corner her after class at the lockers, sometimes bringing a friend or two to persuade her. Despite her reporting him to the teachers, he refused to back down. He was like a leech latching on her skin, draining her blood. She wanted to get rid of him._

 _Then again, if it really did hurt that much as she claimed, it did not hurt to try. She smirked devilishly._

" _Maybe you're right."_

 _It was now the senior's turn to stare. "Julia, you know I was just joking, right?"_

* * *

Nothing irritated Julia more than babies. When Nero was just an infant, he would cry endlessly for their mother in the most ear-bleeding pitch possible. Being the little brat he was, nobody but their mother could cease his cries, not even the most experienced nannies. It would grate her ears and make her blood boil. Her younger self hated the very thought of having a sibling that she would have to share her things with and would steal the limelight from her, which resulted in her incessantly screaming at the infant to shut up.

Even as an adult, she still could not stand those miniature humans despite her mother's efforts in convincing her otherwise. You're a woman. Someday you're going to have children of your own, she said. You must tolerate them whether you like it or not.

Today, her mother was seated on the couch with her, watching television. Lately, her mother was into a drama series that involved a family being torn apart due to the father cheating on his wife with another wealthy lady. The series was extremely long-winded, dragging on to two hundred episodes and counting. She would drone on and on about the events occurring in the episodes in vivid detail, going so far as to make an analysis of the characters personalities and motives. There was no doubt that she was a hardcore fan of the show, and nobody in the estate can escape her rambles, not even the gardener who spends most of his time outside.

As usual, Mrs Konzern was rambling on about the latest scene that involved a car crash during the commercial break. Julia had learned to let her voice float into the background while making it seem like she was listening.

A baby diaper commercial came on the screen. Julia cringed, preparing herself for what was to come.

"Ah, look at that baby! He's so cute! Don't you think so, Julia dear?"

"Yes, mother."

"Say, how much longer must I wait till I can finally carry my grandchild?"

"Mother, there's no need to rush."

"Nonsense! I had you when I was twenty-two!"

Julia sighed, knowing that the conversation would spiral out of control just like all the previous ones if she continued. Yet, she really, really _, really_ hated babies and that fact will not change. Not since that _thing_ started haunting her.

" _You don't like others, because you only like me, right?"_

 _Dream on._

" _Don't deny it~"_

Luckily, the commercial break ended and Mrs Konzern focused her full attention on the television.

* * *

Nero started inviting a female classmate over for too many a day. When Julia found out and asked him about it, he crossed his arms and said that they were just friends. She accepted his answer, but as the weeks and months dragged on, she grew sceptical.

Her suspicions were confirmed when she happened to stumble across them in the gardens. They were seated at a lone bench, huddling against each other with their fingers entwined.

The girl held a white rose in her right hand.

* * *

At six o'clock in the morning, Julia's phone rang. When she picked up the call, she was certainly not expecting Klaus's shouting on the other hand, which was a surprise considering how he was never an excitable person nor had she heard him sound _that_ excited before.

It turned out that his private luxury gym had been fully constructed and was now ready to use. She, including Wales and Sophie, took the liberty to travel all the way to Germany to celebrate its opening, and have a workout while they were there.

The gym was literally every athlete's dream gym, to say the least. It was a two storey building the size of a few football fields and had almost every single sports facility available from all over the world, on top with numerous decorations to beautify the place. It was worthy of being one of the best gyms in the world, but her family's gym stayed on the top of the list as usual.

After the opening party, they spent the entire day in the gym. You guys need to burn all those calories from all the food you wolfed down, Klaus joked, earning a chorus of laughter and giggles from the rest.

* * *

It was another Saturday date night. She and Mason had just finished their dinner. Julia expected to return home, however, the driver drove straight past the Konzern mansion gates.

"Another surprise?" She asked.

"Why yes, dear."

"What do you have in store for me?"

He laughed. "It wouldn't be a surprise if I told you."

"True."

They arrived at the same firefly covered meadow that he showed two years ago. She raised an eyebrow. Surely, he did not come here to show her a scenery that she had seen before.

"Have you discovered a secret underground cave full of gems?" Julia joked.

"Not quite. But I don't need an underground gem filled cave, for I have my gem right here." He then wrapped his right arm around her. Julia rolled her eyes. He tries too hard to be romantic sometimes.

She expected him to crack mushier romantic lines, but she certainly did not expect him to go down on one knee and flash out a small, velvet box. He opened it to reveal one of the most gorgeous diamond ring that she had seen in her whole life. The diamond was rather large and carefully polished to ensure that it sparkled brightly. It had elaborated patterns on the rim of the ring with smaller jewels embedded on it.

"I loved you ever since I met you on that day. I can't get you out of my mind. You're smart, beautiful and powerful. No other woman can compare with you. With the both us working together, we can even be the King and Queen of Europe."

 _No._

Before her was a man who she knew for three years. She knew everything from his favourite colour to his darkest secret.

Yet, he seemed like a complete stranger.

Was his speech memorised and rehearsed beforehand, or did it truly come from the bottom of his heart?

She could always flat out reject him and go back home to sleep. After all, her parents were not present to force her to nod her head, right?

Silence.

"...yes."

Breathing out a sigh of relief, he hastily took out the ring from the box and slid it onto her delicate finger. He threw away the box and smashed their lips together, wrapping his arms around her petite frame.

Did she love him? Maybe, maybe not.

But she had disgraced her family enough, so she never had a choice from the start.

* * *

The announcement of their engagement had been immediate. Both families were as delighted as the press were to have the news that the heirs of Europe's two largest conglomerates were getting married (though there was some leaning on various editors so that the actual date was not released). Their friends were equally happy for the couple, sending endless strings of congratulations.

Mason's younger brother stood as his best man, while Julia's female cousins stood as bridesmaids, along with Sophie being the matron of honour.

Sophie was styling Julia's hair, just like how Julia did during her wedding a year ago. She applied hair serum, hair spray and other various hair cosmetic products to her long, blonde hair. She tied her hair into an updo hairstyle and stuck a few flower pins, including a red rose pin as the largest and most distinguishable among the rest.

"Are you nervous?" Sophie asked.

"Of course. How can I not be?"

"So now you know what it was like for me a year ago."

Julia waved a gloved hand—which managed to hide the self-inflicted cuts from the rest of the world. "Okay, I get it. Stop shoving it in my face."

Sophie giggled. "Calm down. I'm just joking."

Julia rolled her eyes.

Just then, one of the bridesmaids entered the room to request Sophie's presence somewhere else. After they left, she heaved a heavy sigh.

Looking at her reflection in the mirror, she saw an elegant and alluring young bride in a pristine silk dress. Just like Sophie's dress, tiny gold and silver flowers were embroidered on the rim of her skirt but with an addition of gold thread and beads. Her chiffon veil was also white like her dress with scalloped edges.

Who was that beauty staring right back at her?

" _Mommy is pretty!"_

 _..._

" _Everyone loves mommy!"_

 _..._

" _But they won't find mommy pretty if they know~"_

 _Shut UP!_

Returning her gaze to the mirror, she nearly had a heart attack. At the corner of the mirror was a disfigured toddler standing unsteadily on two stubby legs. It looked at her with its soulless black eyes, before opening its mouth to speak again.

" _Nobody will judge mommy on the other side. Mommy will be safe here."_

 _Fuck off! Leave me alone, goddammit!_

" _But I care about you…"_

The scissors on the vanity table glinted under the fluorescent light seductively, just like the penknife.

She reached out to grab it.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

* * *

She was weak.

In the end, she did not even dare to pick it up. Weak, weak, weak was the word that kept on looping in her head like a broken recorder during the wedding ceremony.

By the time they arrived at a secluded resort meant for their honeymoon, she was tired—physically and mentally. Her cheekbones ached from smiling—artificially—and maintaining her confident posture when all she wanted to do was to lay on the floor, close her eyes and never open them again.

Julia hurriedly changed into her nightwear and tucked herself under the covers. She was about to fall asleep when the duvet blanket was yanked off her, and a body pinned her in place.

Her breath hitched at her throat.

"Darling, the mood's great. Do you wanna?"

She tried to say no, but all that came out from her throat was a hoarse whine.

He ruffled her hair and let out a chuckle. She could feel the vibrations on his chest as he laughed.

"So let's…"

His voice was deep and masculine, which many women would consider _sexy._ Yet to her, it seemed alien—terrifying.

Butterfly kisses were planted on her lips before he travelled lower to her neck and collarbone. His hot breath ghosted on her neck and his fingers fiddled with the zipper on the back of her nightgown.

"No…" She whispered, weakly hitting her fists on his chest to get the message across. Yet he continued his advances. His entire being radiated lust, and suddenly the man on top of her was no longer her newlywed husband but _him._ She was no longer lying on a king-sized bed but on the cold steel floor.

 **…**

 _All over the walls of_ his _room were pictures of a pretty young woman doing everyday activities, such as reading a book and typing on a laptop. Judging from the odd camera angles, it seemed that the photographer was taking these pictures discreetly. There was no doubt that_ he _paid someone to take these photos to decorate_ his _room with._

 _But looking closer…_

" _She's a gorgeous one, isn't she?"_

 _She stared at him with widened eyes, slowly backing away._

" _I remember the day we met at a party. Out of all the other ladies in the ballroom, she was the one that caught my eye instantaneously. When she looked at me with those radiant blue eyes, my heart was stolen. But of course, a beauty like her had also captured the attention of other men, perhaps unintentionally. Especially that_ bastard. _He was everything that I wasn't: handsome, rich and powerful. But I tried. I sent her expensive gifts, letters and attention. Yet she rejected it all and went to_ _ **him**_ _instead!"_ He _slammed his fists on the wall in pure anger, making her jump._

 _No, no, no. She thought. This is not happening. She clutched her hands to her chest, trying to calm her erratic breathing. But he kept on advancing towards her, trapping her in a corner._

" _Honestly, when I saw you standing on the stage, for a moment I thought she was standing there instead of her daughter. You have everything she has—her eyes, hair, skin tone, and right down to that prideful attitude. Why do you think I decided to hire you instead of leaving you to die in a ditch?"_

 _She attempted to push_ him _away, but_ he _managed to restrain her hands, rendering her defenceless._

" _I-I'll scream…" She warned, trying to sound undaunted._

" _I have given orders that this wing was to be off limits for the time being. Nobody will hear you."_

" _Stay away from me, you creep!"_

 _Immediately, his smile turned into a scowl. He let go of one of her arms to land a powerful blow on her right cheek, drawing blood at her lips._

" _Stop being so uncooperative. I don't want to mar your pretty face."_

 _Realising that one of her arms were free, she used the opportunity to punch him square in the face. He let out a howl and stumbled back, and she rushed towards the door. However, all hopes of escape came crashing down on her when the automated door refused to open despite her slamming her palm on the green button._

 _From the back,_ he _grabbed her coat and pushed her onto the floor roughly before pinning her arms and legs, rendering her completely and utterly at his mercy. She squirmed and struggled, but deep down she knew that it was futile. Even if she were to somehow escape_ his _grasp, there was no way that she could figure out a way to unlock the door in a few seconds._

" _It's your fault. Why do you resemble her so much?"_

 _Frightened tears spilt from her eyes, knowing that her worst nightmare was about to come true. She looked at the direction of the exit, silently pleading for someone—anyone to save her. It was an impossible scenario, yet she kept on hoping, praying._

He _gently wiped the tears from her eyes. "It's okay, I'll make it quick."_

 _No, no, no. no. She punched the floor three times. Usually, in wrestling matches, the wrestler will let go of his overpowered opponent when the referee slaps the mat three times. Yet_ he _continued to pin her to the floor. She whimpered fearfully, shaking her head in denial._

" _So pretty…"_

 **…**

" _Kick him in the balls._

" _The harder the better."_

 **…**

With a swift strike, she struck her knee in between his legs. He let out a howl of pain, rolling over the bed while holding his crotch like it was on fire. Julia hastily got out of the bed and slammed the door open, running out of the villa as if she were being chased.

Escape was all she could think of right now. Her brain was on autopilot. She needed to run, to create as much distance from him as much as possible. She continued to run despite her bare feet getting dirtied and cut by the road. She continued to run despite not knowing where she was going. She continued to run despite people yelling at her to get her attention.

Somewhere, the ghost child was laughing.

There was a blaring honk, and blinding headlights.

The impact was hard.

* * *

 **So uhm, hi.**

 **If you made it this far without cringing, congrats to you haha.**

 **Honestly thou, I love female Julian she's so much fun to write. Such gorgeousness for a spaghetti haired princes.**

 **I drew inspiration from my favourite local author: Low Kay Hwa. Seriously, his writing style is simple yet gorgeous, and the first book I read from him was awesome. I fell in love with his book called A Photogenic Life. It's fucking gorgeous like a rainbow unicorn flying through cotton candied skies.**

 **Big thanks to my friend Bambee for fueling my inner trash to make me finish this one shot. You owe me those essays yo.**


End file.
